Futurama Pornography Story: I Desire of Leela Chapter 1

Part One- And Lizzie Brought a Casseroleer, Secret

Shes his yellow brick road,

Leading him on and letting him go

As far as she lets him go,

Going down to nowhere.

She puts on her make-up

The same way she did yesterday,

Hoping everythings the same

But everything has changed.

In my mind

Everything we did was right

Open your eyes; Ill still be by your side.

How could I ever have been so blind?

You give me something to sleep to at night.

Something to Sleep To by Michelle Branch

Note: This takes place right after My So-Called Best Friends Wedding,
so if you havent read it, I suggest doing so. Otherwise, you wont get
it and Id really rather not explain who Lizzie is. Not that Id be doing
so to many, seeing as I think around four people actually read my work, but
still! Anyways, thanks for reading.

Scene: The morning after in Frys bedroom at the Saxon Mansion.

(The camera focuses on the curtain blowing in the wind from the open
window.)

Lizzie: (OS) Well, well, wellwhat a pleasant surprise.

(Focus on Leela and Fry who immediately bolt awake.)

Lizzie: I come back expecting to marry the so-called love of my life and
find him in bed with a little skank

Fry: Uhits not what it looks like! Leela was justaw, hell, youre
right.

Leela: Lizzie, please try to understand-

Lizzie: You have no right to address me so informally! You are a guest in
my house and my patience has all but run out.

Leela: Elisabeth, Im so sorry you had to find us like this.

Lizzie: So am I.

Leela: But you cant just expect Fry not to go searching for something to
cling to after you walked out on him.

Lizzie: I thought relationships were based on trust.

Fry: Look, Lizzie-

Lizzie: No, you listen! I trusted that youd be waiting here for me and
look what I find you doing.

Leela: Trust? You should talk, lady.

Lizzie: I beg your pardon!

Leela: You have no right to come and demand from Fry what you yourself
cannot fulfill.

Fry: What?

Lizzie: (fake) II, I dont know what youre talking about.

Leela: I think you do.

Fry: What are you two talking about?

Lizzie: Nothing, sweetheart. Now, if Leela will kindly get dressed and
join me in the hall.

(She steps out. Leela gets out of the bed and gathers up her clothes. She
begins to get dressed, although thankfully we cant see anything.)

Fry: Whats going on here?

Leela: Nothing. Look, Fry, last night was a mistake.

Fry: Yeah, I guess.

Leela: You obviously still love Lizzie, and I cant take that away from
you.

Fry: But

Leela: I dont want to be the one who destroys a relationship. Thats
your job.

(By now, shes fully clothed. Fry is left sitting up in bed, very
confused.)

Fry: Leela, youre not letting me finis-

Leela: I shouldnt be here. Im gonna go talk to Lizzie now so the two of
you can work things out. See ya.

(She lets herself out. Fry stares disdainfully at the door and sighs.)

Cut to Leela and Lizzie in the hall.

Lizzie: How did you find out?

Leela: Amy caught you and the priestwell

Lizzie: Oh god.

Leela: Neither of us told Fry, so he has no knowledge of it.

Lizzie: Thank goodness. I thought my marriage was off.

Leela: You mean, youre still going to marry him?

Lizzie: Of course.

Leela: Thats terrible! You dont deserve him!

Lizzie: You just want me to throw away the most amazing man in the
universe so he can come back to you? Its you who doesnt deserve him.
You made him feel worthless. He needed me to heal the damage.

Leela: I know I dont deserve him, but neither do you. And Im not
cheating on him.

Lizzie: Look, Leela. Ill break things off with Warner, I promise. Dont
take my fiance away from me.

Leela: I have no intention of doing so, but I do have one favor to ask.

Lizzie: Anything.

Leela: Tell Fry about you and Warner.

Lizzie: I cant!

Leela: Then I will.

Lizzie: No! Please! Hes all Ive ever wanted. Dont ruin this for me.

Leela: Why not? You did the same for me. The day after your little
outing I was going to tell him how I felt. Ive been miserable and
depressed ever since. You have no right to just show up and take something
so precious away from me.

Lizzie: Fine. Ill tell him.

Leela: And let him choose between us.

Lizzie: Alright

(Leela puts out her hand.)

Leela: Shake on it.

(Lizzie reluctantly shakes her hand.)

Leela: Its been a pleasure doing business with you.

Cut to a bit later.

(Leela has changed from her gown to normal clothes. She is going down the
stairs when Amy stops her.)

Amy: Hey Leela.

Leela: Oh, hi Amy.

(Amy grabs her and pulls her into the bathroom. She shuts and locks the
door.)

Amy: So whats up?

Leela: What do you mean?

Amy: Oh, come on! You know what I mean.

Leela: No, I dont.

Amy: (rolls eyes) Did you and Fryyou know?

Leela: Amy!

Amy: Im just wondering. I mean, you didnt leave his room last night.

Leela: You noticed?

Amy: Guh. As if it was well concealed.

(Leela freaks out and begins stroking the bottom of her ponytail ala
Leelas Homeworld.)

Leela: Oh no. What are the Saxons going to do? Im dead meat.

Amy: So you did do the forbidden dance!

(Leela breaks down and sits down.)

Leela: (tearfully) Yes!

Amy: Shmeesh. I figured youd wait at least a day

Leela: Amy! Oh, what am I going to do?

Amy: Just forget about it. Well be home soon and you can explain it all
there.

Leela: Its not that simple.

Amy: You told him what was up with Lizzie and the priest, right?

(Silence.)

Amy: You didnt?

Leela: It never came up. And you should have seen how sorry he looked
when Lizzie walked in on us.

Amy: Lizzie knows? Wow. I cant believe you havent skipped town yet.

Leela: I had to stay. I have to patch things up between them. And I
cant let her let loose how she found us

Amy: In a veryromantic yet awkward pose?

Leela: Yep.

Amy: That happened to me the first time Kif stayed over at my parents
house.

Leela: Ouch.

Amy: Oh, it was no biggie. Its not like they havent found me that way
before.

Leela: Amy, as comforting as that is, you dont need to go on.

Amy: Oh sorry. So youre just gonna forget it ever happened?

Leela: Thats the plan.

Amy: What about you and Fry?

Leela: I have no idea. I guess hes just gonna choose between Lizzie and
me.

Amy: Wow. You dont sound too optimistic.

Leela: Its not that Im worried about how Ill act if he marries Lizzie.
Im worried about what might happen if he picks me.

Amy: You mean another divorce?

Leela: Nomore like my parents reaction.

Amy: Dont they like Fry?

Leela: Yeah, but what would they think if they come to say goodnight to me
and Frys there?

Amy: Just stay at his apartment.

Leela: But theyd know I was missing.

Amy: Good point.

Leela: Its like I cant win.

Amy: Wellyou could always have him do the same thing that guy from Pearl
Harbor did in his other movie.

Leela: Huh?

Amy: You know, the really hot guy in 40 Days and 40 Nights.

(Leela gives her a blank expression.)

Amy: Spluh. Nobody watches classic movies anymore. Its about a guy who
promises not to have sex for forty days and falls in love with this girl.

Leela: Aw

Amy: Exactly.

Leela: Too bad Fryd never go for that

Amy: What makes you think he wouldnt?

Leela: Amy, its Fry.

Amy: Good point.

Leela: I guess Ill just have to hang on and hope for the best.

Amy: (smiling) Good luck.

Scene: Later downstairs.

(Everyone is sitting in the living room, reclining.)

Madison: So, Philip, when do you and Elisabeth plan on getting married?

Fry: Well, actually

Lizzie: (rushed) Fry, I have to talk to you!

(She grabs him and pulls him into the kitchen where Serena and Bender are
making out.)

Serena: (embarrassed) Mistress Elisabeth, I was justmaking a casserole for
your mother.

Lizzie: Dont worry about it, Serena. You and Bender go have fun. Ill
take care of it.

(Serena and Bender leave the room.)

Fry: So whats up?

Lizzie: How much do you love me?

Fry: I dunnoa lot, I guess.

Lizzie: Good. I have something I have to tell you.

Fry: O-kay

Lizzie: Dont be upset, but I havent been completely honest with you.

Fry: Well, neither have I.

Lizzie: IIm having an affair.

Fry: Youre what?

Lizzie: Its just thatwell, I didnt know the priest was my ex-boyfriend
and-

Fry: I cant believe you!

Lizzie: But you slept with Leela!

Fry: Because Iwell, its not important. But how could you?

Lizzie: I didnt know I still had feelings for him.

Fry: Obviously.

Lizzie: Here, lets just forget about what I did with Warner and what you
did with Leela and get on with our lives.

Fry: I dont think I can ever trust you again.

Lizzie: What are you saying?

Fry: LizzieI think we should see other people.

Lizzie: So youre just gonna go back to Leela?

Fry: I didnt say that.

Lizzie: Well, its me or her. You cant just abstain.

Fry: Why not?

Lizzie: Because both of us love you and you must love one of us back.

Fry: WellI just need some time to think, okay?

Lizzie: Good idea. Well go back to New New York and work this whole
thing out.

Fry: No, I think Ill go back to New New York.

Lizzie: You mean this is it?

Fry: I cant say for sure, but at the moment, yes.

Lizzie: I understand.

Fry: Thanks.

(He starts to leave the room.)

Lizzie: Fry?

Fry: Yeah?

Lizzie: Could you help me with this casserole? Ive never cooked before
in my life.

Fry: (smiling) Sure.

Cut to about fifteen minutes later.

Lizzie: Thanks.

Fry: No problem.

(They dish up the casserole onto the plates. Fry takes two and is about to
go out.)

Lizzie: Fry? One more thing. Dont forget about Leela. She loves you
more than you know.

Scene: Dinner.

(Everyone is seated at the Saxons long table. Madison and Cale are seated
at either end. Lizzie is sitting next to her father with Fry on her right.
Leela is seated across from Fry next to Zoidberg. They are about to eat
when Madison axes her daughter a question.)

Madison: Have you and Philip set a date for your wedding yet?

Lizzie: Well

Fry: Not exactly.

Madison: What about the twelfth? Thats the day your great, great
grandmother was born. Itd be such a joy to celebrate two things on one
day.

Lizzie: Mom

Madison: And there would be time to get in those roses you always wanted
for your wedding. You know, the pretty ones we saw on our holiday on
Melicina?

Lizzie: Mom

Madison: You were only six then, but Im sure youll remember how you told
your father and I they were the most beautiful blossoms you had ever seen.

Amy: Arent those really expensive and rare and endangered?

Cale: Nothings too good for our little blossom. Isnt that right,
Maddie?

Madison: Oh, of course. Darling, you simply must set a date soon. I
dont want your dress to go out of style. Otherwise wed have to order a
brand new one from Milan 16. And thats quite far away. Though, I daresay
they could always get one of those special companies to ship it overnight,
should we come into that predicamen-

Lizzie: Mom! There is no wedding!

(Madison gasps.)

Madison: Sweetheart, there is a wedding. Youre talking nonsense. Now
dear, you must be tired from your trek. Its not everyday you run away.
Im sure youre just parched.

Lizzie: Im not kidding.

Madison: Of course you are, darling. Why wouldnt there be?

Cale: Dont tell me this is about Philips mistake at the altar. Honey,
we cant all be perfect.

Lizzie: Its not that. Its just that

Madison: What, sweetie?

(Lizzie works up some fake tears.)

Lizzie: He cheated on me!

Madison: What?!

Lizzie: With Turanga!

(The PE crew responds with several Omigod!s and other exclamations, save
for Amy.)

Madison: Oh dear heavens!

Cale: Elisabeth, this had better not be a joke to place revenge on
Turanga. You know it wasnt her fault at the altar.

Lizzie: Im not kidding. I came home this morning. I went into to his
room and I saw them there, basking in the afterglow.

(Madison starts to cry.)

Cale: Philip, I would prefer if you left soon. Preferably by tomorrow
morning.

Fry: Yes, sir.

Madison: I cant believe it. All I ever wanted was for my little girl to
get married. And now its all been ruined by a little slut!

Cale: Well, nothing else can go wrong

(He takes a bite of his casserole and promptly spits it out.)

Cale: Serena!

(Serena runs in.)

Serena: Yes, master?

Cale: How could you poison this household with this dreadful tripe?

Serena: I, I

Cale: This is absolutely unacceptable. I want you gone from this house by
tomorrow as well.

Serena: Y-yes, sir.

Bender: Hey! You have no right to treat her that way!

Cale: I advise you to turn down your volume, robot.

Bender: Im gonna pretend I didnt hear that. Serena didnt make the
casserole!

Cale: Who else could have?

(No one says a word.)

Cale: My point. And even if she didnt create thisslop. I want her
gone. Shes always been nothing but a nuisance. Now, I believe its time
we all retired.

(Everyone leaves the table and heads to their respective rooms. Kif stops
Amy on the way to the attic.)

Kif: Amy, about that question Ive been meaning to ask you

Amy: (expectantly) Yes?

Kif: I cant wait any longer so Im going to ask you now and Im praying
the answers yes.

Amy: Okay.

(Kif and Amy speak the next two lines at the same time.)

Kif: Do you think I should throw Zapp a birthday party?

Amy: I do.

Kif: Great! I was going to ask you a while ago, but I felt kind of
embarrassed, seeing as he mistreats me any chance he gets. But I still
feel compelled to so something for him.

(Amy slaps her forehead.)

Amy: I knew it was too good to be true.

Scene: The next morning.

(Everyone is getting onto the ship. Fry and Leela make absolutely no eye
contact. Serena tearfully walks up to Bender.)

Serena: Oh, Bender, I dont know if I can correctly perform without you.

Bender: Yeah, Ill miss you too. What are you gonna do now that youre
fired?

Serena: I dont know. Maybe turn myself into one of the Flesh Fairs.

Bender: Aw, baby, dont do thatWhy doncha just come back to earth with
us?

Serena: Earthyes, I think that would work.

(She and Bender head toward the ship.)

Bender: Hey Fry! Youre gonna hafta find somewhere else to live. The
apartments full.

Fry: Yeah, whatever, Bender.

(Lizzie comes up to him.)

Lizzie: This is it.

Fry: Yeah, so long.

Lizzie: Im really sorry for all the trouble I caused.

Fry: Its okay. We had some good times.

Lizzie: Yeahso I guess youll go out with Leela, then?

Fry: Honestly, I dont know. I know I love her, but she thinks what we
did was a mistake.

Lizzie: Aw, dont listen to her. She loves you. Youll see.

(They hug.)

Fry: See ya. And dont worry, youll find that special someone.

Lizzie: Bye!

(He boards the ship.)

Cut to Leela getting the ship started.

Leela: Is everybody here?

Amy: Looks like it.

Leela: Okay then. All systems go!

(She starts the ship up and they fly off into space.)

Cut to a little later.

(Amy greets Fry in the hall.)

Amy: Hey Fry.

Fry: Oh, hi.

Amy: So whats up?

Fry: Nothing new. Why do you ask?

Amy: Guh! I wanna know whats up with you and Leela.

Fry: Nothing is going on.

Amy: Dont try that with me. I know theres something there.

Fry: All I know is I love her but she thinks what we did was a mistakeBut
it was an amazing mistake.

Amy: (rolls her eyes) Fry.

Fry: No, I mean it. Sheswow. Now I know why Zapps always after her.

Amy: Fry

Fry: Just hear me out. It was one of the best- hell, it was the best Ive
ever had

(Ends as Amy covers her ears as Fry describes his encounter with Leela.)

Well, thats it for Part One. Part Two should be up soon. Constructive
criticism is much appreciated!