“Kiff! I’m so glad that you called! I miss you so much!” Amy screamed when she saw Kiff on the videophone.
“Hi Amy. Umm… how are you…” Kiff stammered.
“I’m great,” and Amy next told Kiff every detail of her life that’s happened since the last time he called, which was about half an hour ago. After finishing, “and so how are you?”
“I’m swell Amy. I’m so glad that we can talk. I count the seconds until I can see you again. So far it’s been 1,814,876 (21 days give or take a few hundred seconds) seconds since I last saw you in person…” (Author’s note: I apologize for the lameness of the way Kiff talks, but in my defense, he does talk like that so bear with it. It’ll be over soon… For now…)
“Wow Kiff you’ve kept track, but Kiff, you’re suffocating me.” Amy told Kiff.
“But that’s impossible; my skin allows air to flow right through it.”
“No Kiff not physically. You’re always calling, and while I enjoy the attention, you’re never around physically.”
“Umm… you could… umm… move in with me…” Kiff said hopefully.
“No.” Amy answered sternly. “This isn’t working anymore. It was kind of cute for the first couple of months and all, but you’re boring. And I need sex. You never want to have sex. Even videophone sex would have been an improvement over nothing. So goodbye Kiff. And please don’t call anymore. I’ll call you when I want to talk. And I hope we can be friends…”
Amy turned off the videophone and grabbed her jacket. Walking out of her apartment Amy just walked. She didn’t know where to go. She wanted to be comforted. She wanted to be told that it was the right thing to do to break up with Kiff. She just kept walking. With nowhere to go… In time she wound up in front of Bender and Fry’s apartment. Knocking on the door, Amy wasn’t sure why she came here. They wouldn’t be sympathetic after all.
“What do you want meat-bag? I’m busy. I’ve got people to kill. I mean… umm… meet up with… yeah that’s it. I’ve got people to meet up with.”
“Umm… okay then. Can I talk to Fry?”
“Who told you Fry lives here?! Oh wait. We did… that’s right. It’s all coming back to me now… you’re Amy… and we ‘work’ together… okay I guess you can come in. BUT DON”T TOUCH ANYTHING!!!” Walking into the empty apartment, the two found fry sitting on a sofa watching TV, with his feet propped up on a pile of empty pizza boxes. “Yo Fry one of the meat bags from work is here. I think its name is Amy.”
“Hey Fry what’s up?” Amy asked cheerfully.
“Hey Amy. Shouldn’t you be talking to Kiff right now?” Fry asked, not even adverting his eyes or attention away from the TV.
“Umm… I just broke up with Kiff. He was to boring.”
“Women break up with me for that reason all the time.” Fry said, finally turning off the TV and turning his attention to Amy.
“No they don’t!” Bender interrupted. “You don’t get any dates. All you do is sit around.”
“True, but I do get rejected because I’m boring.” Fry countered.
“That you do my friend that you do.” Bender reflected.
“Hey you guys wanna have sex?” Amy blurted out. She was desperate, and she knew Fry was too. Plus she slept with him before, and she knew he had a big cock.
“I don’t know… would this sex have to have a relationship around it, or could it just be about the sex?” Fry asked.
“It would be only the sex. And you can’t tell anyone.”
“I know. I’ve had relationships before…”